Banish Sibling Rivalry by Appreciating the Differences between Children

Have you drawn a name for a holiday gift giving event this year? I did and the person whose name I drew is someone that I knew would appreciate a homemade gift. Only problem is, I don't really have any skills that would end in a suitable gift. Fortunately, my sister loves to make scarves and blankets so I was able to get a lovely scarf for this event from her.

I was at her house today showing her how to use her new arc trainer. I can spend three hours on an arc trainer getting ready for a triathlon but I couldn't sit still to knit, sew or crochet for even three minutes. Yet, we're sisters, same mom and dad, same house we grew up in, same schools we attended, etc. Happily, I can give personal training advice to my sister and she can shower me with the results of her long hours of hard work. Doesn't strike me as a fair trade but she doesn't seem to mind.

Perhaps you have more than one child living in your home, too, and you've discovered how different they can be from each other. Keeping that in mind will help you maximize each child's potential. When my grandson saw the sonogram of his little sister who is due to join us this spring, he insisted it was a picture of a puppy. He's in for a surprise or two but so are my daughter and son-in-law. After having six children myself, all I know is each one is a unique gift and what works for one will not necessarily work for the next one.

While you are celebrating the holidays also celebrate these differences and help your children to do the same. Think about the differences you've noticed. For example, we each perceive and understand the world around us through different pathways. Learning styles are a big part of who you are and who your children are. Everyone also has a time of day when they are more productive, alert, and engaged. Some people love group interaction and others may want to spemd more time on their own. Some like chocolate, some vanilla...

When these differences become apparent and even threaten to cause disharmony , we can use these differences to teach our children about individual preferences that are neither right nor wrong, just different. Being made aware of this early in life will give them a distinct advantage in understanding and getting along with others. As time goes by, they will increasingly admire and come to rely on the strengths they see in each other. Learning this lesson from their siblings will open their hearts to the differences in other people and their lives will be enriched by their ability to get along with others. An inability to get along with others is one of the key reasons for someone losing their job. This is an essential skill for much of what you hope for your child and they can learn it from you today as you appreciate each child for their unique differences.